"I couldn't help noticing how happy you look," she says. "What's your secret for a long, happy life?"
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"I smoke three packs a day, drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods and never, ever exercise."
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"Twenty-six."
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A woman walks up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch.
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"Wow, that's amazing," says the woman. "How old are you?"
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