Campbell

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IT’S GETTING HARDER AND HARDER to be a bastard.

By the time I get into the courtroom, my hands are trembling. Part of it, of course, is the same old same old.

But part of it involves the fact that my client is about as responsive as a boulder beside me; and the womanI’m crazy about is the one I am about to put on the witness stand. I glance once at Julia as the judge enters;she makes a point of looking away.

My pen rolls off the table. “Anna, can you get that for me?”

“I don’t know. I’d be wasting time and manpower, wouldn’t I?” she says, and the goddamn pen stays on thefloor.

“Are you ready to call your next witness, Mr. Alexander?” Judge DeSalvo asks, but before I can even sayJulia’s name Sara Fitzgerald asks to approach the bench.

I gear up for yet another complication, and sure enough, opposing counsel doesn’t disappoint. “Thepsychiatrist that I’ve asked to call as a witness has an appointment at the hospital this afternoon. Would it beall right with the Court if we took her testimony out of order?”

“Mr. Alexander?”

I shrug. It’s just a stay of execution for me, when you get right down to it. So I sit down beside Anna andwatch a small, dark woman with a bun twisted ten degrees too tight for her face take the stand. “Please stateyour name and address for the record,” Sara begins.

“Dr. Beata Neaux,” the psychiatrist says. “1250 Orrick Way, Woonsocket.”

Dr. No. I look around the courtroom, but apparently I’m the only James Bond fan. I take out a legal pad andwrite a note to Anna: If she married Dr. Chance, she’d be Dr. Neaux-Chance.

A smile twitches at the corner of Anna’s mouth. She picks up the pen that dropped and writes back: If she gota divorce and then married Mr. Buster, she’d be Dr. Neaux-Chance-Buster.

We both start to laugh, and Judge DeSalvo clears his throat and looks at us. “Sorry, Your Honor,” I say.

Anna passes me another note: I’m still mad at you.

Sara walks toward her witness. “Can you tell us, Doctor, the nature of your practice?”

“I’m a child psychiatrist.”

“How did you first meet my children?”

Dr. Neaux glances at Anna. “About seven years ago, you brought in your son, Jesse, because of somebehavioral problems. Since then I’ve met with all the children, over various occasions, to talk about differentissues that have come up.”

“Doctor, I called you last week and asked you to prepare a report giving your expert opinion aboutpsychological harm Anna might suffer if her sister dies.”

“Yes. In fact, I did a little research. There was a similar case in Maryland in which a girl was asked to be adonor for her twin. The psychiatrist who examined the twins found they had such a strong identification witheach other that if the expected successful results were achieved, it would be of immense benefit to thedonor.” She looks at Anna. “In my opinion, you’re looking at a very similar set of circumstances here. Annaand Kate are very close, and not just genetically. They live together. They hang out together. They haveliterally spent their entire lives together. If Anna donates a kidney that saves her sister’s life, it’s a tremendousgift—and not just to Kate. Because Anna herself will continue to be part of the intact family by which shedefines herself, rather than a family that’s lost one of its members.”

This is such a load of psychobabble bullshit I can barely see to swim through it, but to my shock, the judgeseems to be taking this with great sincerity. Julia, too, has her head tilted and a tiny frown line between herbrows. Am I the only person in the room with a functioning brain?

“Moreover,” Dr. Neaux continues, “there are several studies that indicate children who serve as donors havehigher self-esteem, and feel more important within the family structure. They consider themselvessuperheroes, because they can do the one thing no one else can.”

That’s the most off-the-mark description of Anna Fitzgerald I have ever heard.

“Do you think that Anna is capable of making her own medical decisions?” Sara asks.

“Absolutely not.”

Big surprise.

“Whatever decision she makes is going to have overtones for this entire family,” Dr. Neaux says. “She’sgoing to be thinking of that while making her decision, and therefore, it will never truly be independent. Plus,she’s only thirteen years old. Developmentally her brain isn’t wired yet to look that far ahead, so any decisionwill be made based on her immediate future, rather than the long term.”

“Dr. Neaux,” the judge interrupts, “what would you recommend, in this case?”

“Anna needs the guidance of someone with more life experience…someone who has her best interests inmind. I’m happy to work with the family, but the parents need to be the parents, here—because the childrencan’t be.”

When Sara turns the witness over to me, I go in for the kill. “You’re asking us to believe that donating akidney will net Anna all these fabulous psychological perks.”

“That’s correct,” Dr. Neaux says.

“Doesn’t it stand to reason, then, that if she donates that same kidney—and her sister dies as a result of theoperation—then Anna will suffer significant psychological trauma?”

“I believe her parents will help her reason through that.”

“What about the fact that Anna’s saying she doesn’t want to be a donor anymore,” I point out. “Isn’t thatimportant?”

“Absolutely. But like I said, Anna’s current state of mind is driven by the short-term consequences. Shedoesn’t understand how this decision is really going to play out.”

“Who does?” I ask. “Mrs. Fitzgerald may not be thirteen, but she lives each day waiting for the other shoe todrop in terms of Kate’s health, don’t you think?”

Grudgingly, the psychiatrist nods.

“You might say she defines her own ability to be a good mother by keeping Kate healthy. In fact, if heractions keep Kate alive, she herself benefits psychologically.”

“Of course.”

“Mrs. Fitzgerald would be much better off in a family that included Kate. Why, I’d even go as far as to saythat the choices she makes in her life are not at all independent, but rather colored by issues concerningKate’s health care.”

“Probably.”

“Then by your own reasoning,” I finish, “isn’t it true that Sara Fitzgerald looks, feels, and acts like a donorfor Kate?”

“Well—”

“Except she’s not offering her own bone marrow and blood. Just Anna’s.”

“Mr. Alexander,” the judge warns.

“And if Sara fits the psychological profile of a closely related donor personality who can’t make independentdecisions, then why is she any more capable of making this choice than Anna?”

From the corner of my eye, I can see Sara’s stunned face. I can hear the judge banging his gavel. “You’reright, Dr. Neaux—parents need to be parents,” I say. “But sometimes that isn’t good enough.
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